Diary of A "Single" Dad's Girlfriend Part I

My Absolutely-Stellar-Hero-Man, Orion (our rabbit), and I.

I'm the girlfriend of a "single" dad. I put "single" in quotes because he's not exactly married (as he's getting a divorce) and he's not exactly single (as he's dating me.) You don't really hear about the girlfriends of "single" dads too often. I mainly hear about single moms & their boyfriends. But what about us girlfriends? Where do we fit in? And why is it that when it comes up in conversation (that I am the girlfriend of a "single" dad) that most people just look at me like I was the one that broke up the marriage/relationship in the first place?

You know, it is hard enough trying to make a relationship work, but add into the mix little human beings? It is hardcore. Especially for me. Not only am I an only child (so I'm all about being selfish. Cough.), but I also have no idea what to do with kids. No idea at all.

The Kids

A little background history about the history of my relationship with my boyfriend and how I came into contact with these two little ones:

I moved to San Diego in October of 2008. My boyfriend (Roger, my Absolutely-Stellar-Hero-Man) and I met in late November of 2008. Our meeting wasn't conventional. We met over the Internet because I was looking to meet people in the area (all of our friends & family have heard our cover story of us meeting at a Starbucks randomly) and after chatting extensively through email for a few days, we decided to meet in person. The first night we met, I was joking around & told him that I had no idea about kids and I'd probably lock one in a closet because I'd be so frustrated. Only to find out that not only did he have one kid, but he had another one. That's right, count 'em, that's two. Open mouth. Insert foot.

So regardless of my faux-pas, My ASHM still kept talking to me, and about two weeks later he asked me to be his girlfriend. Awesome. I was stoked (and still am.) Here was this Californian Boy who wanted to date me. Awkward, smokin' like a chimney, loud, punk/psychobilly listenin', dramatic, over-the-top me. I knew about his kids and told him that I had no idea what to do with kids, and he said that that was okay. And that when I was ready to meet them, I could. At that point in time the kids were still living with their mom, and My ASHM saw them a couple days a week.

Fast forward to March when I've hung out with them a couple times (only for a couple hours and I still have no idea what to do/say/not do/not say). That is when this post comes into play. And our relationship world turned upside down. The kids now live with My ASHM full time. Their mom has shown up in the past four months. But she is barely a part of their lives anymore. Which really sucks.

And where do I fit in?

Well, that's what I hope to explore in this series of blog posts. I'm planning on (with My ASHM's permission) writing about what it's like being the girlfriend of a "single" dad. Talking about the ups and the downs, the great parts and the not-so great parts, the things that make me smile and the things that really bum me out, and talking about the day-to-day things that go on with our lives together.

Hope you're down for the ride.

-Britt Vicious

I've Decided to Start Blogging Again

So, I've decided to start blogging again. Mainly because I feel like I use Twitter entirely too much and Tumblr too. I'm a little too old to use LiveJournal seriously so I turn to Blogger, because that just seems like the adult thing to do.

And why didn't I write for so long? Why is it that there is a four month break between this post and the last post? Because I just didn't know if I really wanted to write anymore. I didn't know whether this would be something I'd want to do or if I just wanted to delete everything I'd written and ignore that I had ever felt that way or I had ever been through that. Sometimes it's very easy for me to ignore things until they just pass over me. I'm too much like my bio-dad in that aspect.

Regardless. I guess I feel the need to update because there is just entirely too much going on in my life for me not to. Maybe if I start writing things out again I won't feel like the world is so overwhelming. Maybe. Maybe not. Who knows.